A Feminist who Loves Death Metal?

Last night we drove to St. Louis to attend a two-stage metal fest that featured the bands Goatwhore and Dying Fetus. Our friend's band All Eyes Upon Adelaide also played and we love seeing them live.

To me, there is nothing like live, loud music to drown out all the sorrows and suffering in the world. Not only does my body physically benefit from the amazing pain relieving properties of throbbing amps, but I get a lot out of hanging out with metal heads. I'm going to tell you a secret. . .

Louis Benjamin Falgoust II of Goatwhore making time for fans during the sound check.

 Metal guys are among the most intelligent and sweetest guys in the world. Yes, you get the occasional jerk who's there to use his drinking as excuse to start fights in the pit, but those guys are so easy to spot.  I love talking to people at shows because if you have a dark sense of humour like I do there aren't many places to adequately express oneself.

Don't I have a conflict with my liberal feminist beliefs and metal lyrics? No. I don't. Art is a different category for me and metal bands, for the most part, are not out there perpetuating stereotypes about real women.  Instead, the type of metal I love most, death metal, is for the most part a way to relieve rage through music. Maybe that's why so many of those guys are so genuinely awesome? Rage filled, hate spewing music actually gives us an outlet to relieve feelings like those. Weirdly, music that to some people may resemble a wall of unwanted noise is a way for those of us who love it to get in touch with our emotions.

Now sitting here at home the day after with a headbanging hangover (stupid girl!) I realize that I have the time to analyze the metal subculture. At the show most of us aren't thinking along these lines. We are socializing, drinking, and having fun. Metal is a tribe that those of us who are passionate about it would and do literally bleed for. The ritualistic, shamanic connection in live metal shows is so obvious. Headbanging, moshing, even standing still alters the consciousness of each person and we are transported along with the music.

When Goatwhore played I felt this incredible energy rise from the crowd. The air was thrumming with not just the bass lines, but with a movable force that shimmered over us, sped through us, and whirled in a vortex matching the movement of the moshers behind those of us in the front row. I felt like a priestess churning a cauldron of pure spirit.

Beautiful madness.

Much like my love of Goth music and my self-identification as a Gothy type, the metal I listen to deals with themes of death, isolation, and the darker side of life that the wider culture shuns away from. Being in touch with our shadow (if you want to get Jungian) is a key to unlocking our full person.  The lyrics of the bands I truly enjoy are incredibly poetic and some political in nature.

To end this I'll leave you with a snippet of lyrics from Collapse in Eternal Worth from Goatwhore's latest album Blood for the Master.

The spirit of twilight
Reclaim this dark power
Digest the archetype
In this verse of hate

This abhorrent manner
Filthy rite of outrage
A trembling coldness
The collapse of reason

Mount the wings of death
Wield the scythe of this ancient craft
Poison heavens in the blackest flame
Rise forth from this decay